New Wishes

Tuesday, April 21st, 2015 11

It is April. Spring. To say it is a time of transition — in the year and in my life — is to put it mildly. I have been quiet here of late as my whole world has been turned upside down. I’m s-l-o-w-l-y coming back to ground, back to right-side up. Searching and discovering whatever this new version of “normal” is going to be.

Every single day of January and February, and even into March, felt hard. As in “I’ve never gone through anything this difficult” hard. I had a constant wish that my heart would stop hurting, that the pit in my stomach would go away, that I would wake up from the nightmare I felt my life had become. Those wishes never actually came true. Not in the instantaneous way I had wished for, anyway.

PX70_CP_WishField_rsBut…my heart is healing. The pit in my stomach is subsiding. The nightmare still goes on, yet it is becoming less terrifying. And as these transitions have been occurring, I find that my mind has allowed for just a bit of space to dream. I’m feeling the cracks of openness to glimpse the hopefulness this season brings — of renewal, of awakening. As my birthday comes this week, as I embark on an altogether different chapter of my life, one that I never planned and certainly never expected, I wonder what new wishes I might be making…

11 Responses

  1. Mary Heppner says:

    Renewal, regeneration, rekindling, revitalization, replenishment….you deserve it all….wishing you an early happy birthday and a year that continues to allow for healing and which opens that crack toward future dreams a little further. And in the words of my favorite singer song writer Kate Wolf “… And try to believe that the sweetest hello. Always comes after the hardest goodbye.”….

  2. Corinna says:

    I just KNOW that the space you hold for your new dreams and wishes will allow them to flourish in the most amazing way. I can’t wait to see what unfolds. xoxo

  3. Elizabeth Grant Thomas says:

    I echo Mary’s words entirely. I’m happy to see you back in this space again, dreaming and creating a new chapter.

    • Meghan says:

      Thanks, E. I hope that I continue to feel more and more like myself and that my creativity starts flowing again. xoxo

  4. Anne Powell says:

    You are a very strong lady. I had no doubt you would land on your feet eventually. Blessings & positive vibes coming your way.

  5. Emily says:

    Oh Meghan, my heart hugs you. I’ve been isolated these last few months and not paying attention to much outside my own little bubble. I dropped by here today to see what you’ve been up to and gasped. I wish I could take you to tea right this very minute and infuse laughter and healing in the leaves. Instead, I’ll just remind you gently that you are not alone and that this, too, shall pass. They are platitudes but dammit if they’re not also true. xoxo -em

    • Meghan says:

      Hi Emily–Thank you so much for your kind note and thoughts. I wish we could go for tea and laugh and have some fun. I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I hope you are doing okay, too. Hugs right back. xoxo

  6. […] this new path in my life, managing this unexpected part of the journey, I find myself fumbling. I’m tripping over unseen roots and keeping a kind of […]

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