Category : Travel
I will not hang my head,
Walk sheepishly into any room,
Slink and slouch to be unnoticed.
I will not make myself small,
Cover my heart,
Avert my eyes.
I am immune to the outside forces,
To the boxes,
To the labels.
I am too strong,
Too brave for those.
I know my truth,
I stand firmly,
In the light.
this mermaid is being called,
pulled by the ocean.
she sees the emeralds,
and it feels like home.
she aches to dive in,
feel the familiar,
the tide against her flesh,
her hair fan out in the waves.
yet, her gills feel inconsequential,
not quite developed.
or more apt, not quite regrown.
she wants to swim,
to delve deep again.
but she is still too much…human.
but, it’s coming,
that old knowing,
rebirthed into a greater truth.
and the ocean will rush to greet her return…
Some people ask how I can be so open, how I lay my heart out, how I let myself be seen. Today’s entry in Mark Nepo’s The Book of Awakening gives a powerful answer to those questions that rings true for me… “One of the most painful barriers we can experience is the sense of isolation the modern world fosters, which can only be broken by our willingness to be held, by the quiet courage to allow our vulnerabilities to be seen. For as water fills a hole and as light fills the dark, kindness wraps around what is soft, if what is soft can be seen. So admitting what we need, asking for help, letting our softness show – these are prayers without words that friends, strangers, wind, and time all wrap themselves around.”
Do you look with wonder upon the world?
Do you see the good that surrounds you, that lies within you?
When was the last time you felt awe?
Like gobsmacked-stop-you-in-your-tracks-you-almost-can’t-take-it awe?
I want to live like that.
Astounded. Speechless. AWAKE.
I want to see with fresh eyes,
touch with new skin,
taste with eager mouth.
I want wonder to be my bridegroom, for all of my days.
Last month I had the opportunity to take an amazing trip to California. And by amazing, I mean that Big Sur an Napa were on the docket along with being together with some of my most cherished friends. As if going to the Esalen hot springs at 1am to soak under the clearest sky filled with the brightest stars hearing the crash of the Pacific waves directly below was not epic enough, there was also the hike to a swimming hole, the discovery of flat whites, and staying at the kitschy Madonna Inn.
But then came four magical days spent at a Napa vineyard with these people, a most inspired and inspiring group of artists…
This time, space, and bounty wouldn’t have been possible without our benefactor, Timm, host and party-thrower extraordinaire…
I send out a heart-filled thank you to each of these kindreds. You filled my cup during those four sparkling days and nights in Napa. Thank you for letting me see you, and for you seeing me. Can’t wait until our next adventure. xoxo
For those photographers interested, black and white photo shot on Tri-X 400 with Pentax 645N camera, color photos shot on Portra 160 with Canon AE-1 camera, and the two Polaroids shot on Impossible 600 with Polaroid SLR680.